Communication is key is all aspects of life and vital for couples to communicate in a marriage. It tends to be easier said than done at times and If there is a communication breakdown, the marriage may breakdown.

The most important feeling from the parties is they want to be understood and feel their emotions are being valued by the other person. When it comes across as a one sided effort or worst case, no effort at all, problem start to arise. No one walks into a counselling session saying “We really understand each other, that’s why we want a divorce!”.

How can couples have a better and healthier interaction? Here are eight starting pointers:

1) Appreciate Each Other Daily

A note, text message or compliment can go afar. Reminding your spouse know they are appreciated is important or knowing their efforts don’t go unnoticed.

2) Listen Actively

Empathic listening means not responding with solutions or options, but rather phrase such as ‘I can see you are upset”. It can be hard to do when triggered so easily. Practising with small things before you become triggered is a good start

3) Write Down Criticisms

If you criticise your spouse aloud, there will be flare ups. Write down things that rub you the wrong way and present it to your partner. When criticism is presented this way, your partner can take it, process it and formulate an answer rather than firing back a comment.

4) Practice Positivity

Research shows happy couples who practice a 5:1 ratio positive to negative behaviour are more likely to be happy and healthy. In saying this, very few married couples practice this.